THE DAY I WAS SHOT.... TIMI DAKOLO

When Timi Dakolo packed his belongings from grandmother’s Port Harcourt home for the West African Idols competition in 2007, he was unsure of what the future held for him. But unperturbed about letting the world hear his voice, Dakolo sang his way through the competition to the top and has not looked back since then. In this interview with
JOAN OMIONAWELE, the famous singer talks about his journey through stardom, family life and other issues. Excerpts:

How has it been since West African Idols?
A lot has happened, I got married, I was in the labour room, I bought a new car, I have a bigger house and my own studio. I have met people and people now like me more than before.
What do you mean by people now like you better than before?
Nobody knew me before now.
What was life like before Fame came your way..
Nobody liked me, I was like the wind, I would be somewhere and nobody noticed me. Life was not easy because I grew up with my grandmother, she was an old woman who was very strict with me, she was also a trader too. Then, there were more downs than ups, there were more have-nots than haves. You know, when they say after the rain comes shine? for me, it was not, back then,  after the rain came heavy rain.
Where were your parents?
They were here in Lagos, Festac to be precise.
Why did you have to grow up with your grandmother?
They brought me to my grandmother because they wanted to flex some more, I was like the “stumbling block”, but they gave birth to more “stumbling blocks”
You said you have been to the labour room three times, can you describe the experience.
Let me just say it in one word -thank God I am a man! It was not funny at all. The nice all curly hair we all see are usually not the seen there o. They are not your friends then. You can’t even tell them anything because they will shout back at you, they are usually violent.
There was nothing funny about my first experience, but the experience with the other two children was fun.
How scared were you?
(exclaims) If you knew the pain my wife felt. It wasn’t funny at all.
So are you going to the labour room anytime soon?
NOOO. Three is now a multitude.
Timi Dakolo is known for slow love songs.... despite the craze for hip hop and rap today...why is this so?
I love good music, I don’t just want to be there, I want to be heard. There is nothing wrong with fast music, I just do the softer part better. I also have fast songs though, but I have more softer songs which carry a message.
Why did you choose music
Music chose me, I grew up to love music, so it has always been there, I stumbled into music. There is this saying- sometimes you meet destiny on the way to avoiding it. In my house back in those days, we used to listen to listen to lots of reggae music, but you could never say you wanted to be a musician. You could get arrested, you would even have to refund all the money they paid to sponsor your education.
So when you told your parents that you wanted to be a musician, what did they say?
I didn’t tell them I wanted to become a musician, that’s why I told you earlier that I stumbled into music. When I was going for west African Idols, I did not tell them anything because, in my house, they can laugh.
In fact, if they laugh at you, you will examine your life. But when they did not see me for a while, they started watching me on TV, and then it became that’s our son, we are very proud of him, we knew he had something in him, so that’s how they embraced me. But if I did not win, they would have calculated all the money used to train me in school and probably have me refund it.
What are you currently working on?
I’m working on my new album, it’s entitled love and consequences.
Do you use your music to settle differences between you and your wife?
Initially, it used to work o (laughs), but now, it doesn’t work again, Nowadays, she treats the mess up instantly by saying please I don’t want to hear anything. In good times, yes music works, but in bad times, like when I’m supposed to be back home by 7:p.m and I comeback by 10:p.m, even if Michael Jackson sings the song to her, it wouldn’t  mean anything. She would say let’s communicate in words.
Unlike your colleagues, you are barely seen at events(except you are to perform)Why have you decided to keep a low profile.
I go out once in a while but I’m not used to going to clubs
Because you are married?
No, but they would know I am new there,because I may do something odd, like looking for a book to start reading or watching Tv.
Aren’t you under pressure by your Pr to go out more?
But I go out, I see movies at the palms from time to time. I’m a loner actually, I love my private time.
What are the things you can’t be caught doing
Sagging and wearing tattoos
Why?
I can’t  be walking and adjusting my trousers too. There are other things to do with that time. It takes a lot to do shakara o.
So are you saying you can never have a tattoo?
Yes I can, but that would be my children’s tattoo, later in life.
You were shot some years ago, what went through your mind at that particular moment?
A lot went through my mind, but one thing I knew was that I could not just die like that.
You are married to a Yoruba lady. Was there anytime you had issues on intertribal marriage?
From where? I will arrest the person now. No one has the right to determine who I will spend forever with. You know how long forever is. When it was time to get married to her, I went to my family and told them.
Why did you opt for a low key wedding at Ilorin?
She grew up in Ilorin. One thing that always scares men, is the fact that the wedding is too expensive and the marriage is far more important than the wedding. How can you spend all your money because you want people to gather and eat your rice?
So you didn’t want people to come and eat your rice?
No. It’s a special day but it doesn’t have to be that expensive, but classy, a lot of guys want to get married.
You sing about love all the time, what propels you always to sing about love?
My first encounter of music was mostly love songs
What was your first encounter of love?
Hmmm! I’ve loved o. I don’t want to remember it. If I see that lady, I may just push her down. Love could make a grown man cry. You see, they did not only break my heart, they’ve blended it, so, it’s now liquid.
As a married man, what keeps you going in times when you have differencies with your wife, because I am sure that there are times you want to be alone.
Ah! Then I will not eat o, (speaks to the screen)Baby if you are seeing this, I always want to see you o. But really, we are friends. I could just call her from the blues and ask her how her boyfriends who are always toasting her are. Communication solves a lot of problems, what you don’t say hurts, keeping secrets and being unfaithful is hardwork.
So you are saying you can never cheat on your wife?
My wife is a Kogi woman. She has everything I need. Like I said earlier, it’s hard to cheat because you will be hiding your phone, locking it and running helter skelter, when you are not an actor.
I make sure she knows where I am, If I say I’m coming home soon, I try to keep the promise.
What are your concerns about Nigeria?
A lot is not in place. People are not sure of their lives, they walk around with one eye open. We still lack the basic amenities. I don’t know what to say anymore, but I have never seen a people as hopeful as Nigerians, and we can’t afford to lose that hope. I think we created the word e go better(it is well). We should not see Nigeria as a mere country, but as our own. This Boko Haram issue is saddening, It’s only in this country that foreigner can come in and live effortlessly, they would get local govt identification and that’s it. Our database is so porous.
You were almost involved in a plane crash with General Azazi...
Yes. But I wouldn’t have died. I know how I am going to die, I will relax with my children and great grand children. I won’t die by accident. Do you know how many times things have happened to me? And I’m still here...
What happened that day......
We were just talking after the event and told the pilot to let us know if there was space, so that we could go with him, we were even looking at it when the  plane went down.
What was your reaction ?
(Bows head)I just understood immediately, the emptiness of life. Vanity upon vanity, all is vanity.
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